I never realised how much it would hurt. Spending five years with people, even those who I don’t like, leaves a bond of sorts-a kind of relationship formed through sharing experiences. There are many in my year group who I dislike with almost every fibre of my being, but I’m going to miss them. I have never kept much store in sentiment, and being weepy at separations, and yet here I am. And it’s not just the people I’m not fond of. There are some to whom I barely speak, but I know them. These are people who I have spent five years with, and damn if I’m not going to miss them. And my friends. I have this fear that we won’t keep in touch, that one day we’ll just stop talking. My fears aren’t unfounded; it’s happened before. What if they forget? What if I forget? What if one day I don’t wish them a happy birthday? What if we forget to meet up at Christmas to exchange gifts? I don’t know if I could face that. I’ve lost too many friends due to separation, and I know all too well how easily it can happen. We’ve made a pact, to keep meeting up whenever we can, but it’s not like we all live within ten minutes walk from each other. I’m shoddy with replying to texts as it is, and I rarely check Facebook, so how will I know if they have contacted me? This is something I am terrified of, truly, and I don’t think I could face promising to keep in touch and then not doing so. If happened once with Akari; I don’t want it to happen again.

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